Raising a red flag is something you should never do out of impulse because if your allegations are only based on paranoia, you can damage your relationship beyond repair. And the thing about cheaters is that it is more likely that they deny their wrongful doings so you better back yourself up with enough indispensable evidence. It is your lucky day because today, you will hear from me the arts of catching your spouse red handed and I guarantee you that this is the ultimate road to the discovery of truth.
1. Eavesdropping – This is the least thing you can do without the intervention of technology and use of monetary resources. Simply listen to his conversations with other people done in person. You might want to move to a hiding spot when you do this. If he is keeping his voice low or staying away when someone comes over, then perhaps he is keeping something away from you. Probably the weakness of this approach is that you are the only one who will evaluate his gestures and tones with other people and chances are your views will be subjective.
2. Private investigator – Do you think you have a pocket full of money? If so, then you can hire a private investigator to keep an eye on him. The advantage of this method is you get to gather solid proofs that can substantiate your claims about his infidelities. Furthermore, you can also demand for documentations on his extra marital affair so you get the chance to ‘meet’ the other woman.
3. Phone sleuthing – Invasion through his mobile unit is a risky step so if you are fully decided to do this, prepare yourself to deal with anything you find, good or bad. If you have an old telephone in the house, position it somewhere he frequently receive and make calls. Plug it into the telephone jack and remove the mouthpiece. Set up another receive phone somewhere you only know. Once he gets there and you hear him talking to someone, go back to your receiver phone and lift it. Do this very discreetly in order to avoid causing noises to the spying telephone you set up.
4. Calls – Your cheating spouse might be doing his dirty works over the wires. Try to assess his reactions over some phone calls he receives. Does he appear tensed? Does he go somewhere he cannot be heard? If you have a way to get through to his calls and hear every conversation, you are a step closer to the truth.
5. Text – Unlike calls and actual conversations, taking a peek through his text messages would lead you to more solid evidence no matter how much he argues that messages have no emotions. Signs of deletion of texts from someone may also mean that he is clearing his tracks.
6. Emails – Perhaps he want to do his thing using electronic mails that are less conspicuous than text messaging and phone calls. This is a bit tricky because you have to move fast. When he leaves his laptop or phone unattended, quickly browse through his emails and look for instances wherein you have to raise a red flag.
7. Phone gallery – A picture paints a thousand words or so they say. His phone gallery might have something to say about his recent activities for the past few days and who are the people he hang out with. Notice if there is anyone who appears often in the photos.
8. GPS – Installing this device in the car will let you know if your spouse is really staying up late in the office or he is telling the truth when he says he will chill out at a local bar with some friends. This will also tell you if he is, by any chance, dropping by a motel for some quick action.
9. Car Mileage – Take note of the car mileage before your partner leaves the house for work and compare it after he comes back. Do this a couple of times in order to see a pattern in his travel routines. If you notice any discrepancy, ask him if he has gone anywhere before going home. If he is not hiding anything, he might just say yes but if he is trying to conceal something, he might deny that he had gone anywhere.
10. Clothes – Are you the one who washes the clothes but suddenly your ‘better half’ got interested in doing the laundry? Try to sniff his clothes and sense if there is a change in odor, a presence of unfamiliar feminine scent for instance. Check the pockets and the fabric for unusual things like lipstick stains.
11. Contraceptives – Still active in sex life? Think about how frequent he uses contraceptives and assess whether the sudden emergence of one can be accounted to the number of times you had sex for the past few weeks. Contraceptives in the car or inside the wallet may mean that he is always on the go. Does this coincide with your typical romantic escapades inside the house?
12. Shaved hair – Couples who have been together for long tend to be too comfortable with one another such that they overlook details like unshaved body hairs. Some people claim that when a married person suddenly becomes jumpy when it comes to his physical appearance, he might be trying to look beautiful for someone.
13. Baby monitor – If you still have a baby in the house, no one will suspect that you are using the baby monitor to catch your spouse cheating. It is fine if you have no baby monitor because you can improvise this gadget using your old smartphones.
14. Hidden camera – Take spying into a higher level by setting up hidden cameras all over the house. You can position them in inanimate objects such as table lamps, picture frames and the likes.
15. Digital recorder – Many tech shops offer digital recorders that can be purchased at a wide range of prices. These microcomputers are easy to use as they can be hidden anywhere. The downside on this is that you can only track his conversations, not his facial expressions and gestures.
16. Spy app – Another convenient way to spy on a cheater is to install spy apps in his phone. Spy apps are cheap but your only problem here is how you can ‘borrow’ his phone. With spy softwares, you can track his calls, texts, emails, phone gallery, location and almost everything there is to know.
17. Pop onto his computer – While he is away, quickly surf through his computer. Check on his files and folders and try to look for something suspicious. He might have also encrypted some files and it is for you to assess why would he do that.
18. Friends – Are there some people who just suddenly appeared in his circle? Or is he suddenly talking a lot to his friends? Bizarre behaviors and awkward gestures with friends might suggest that something is amiss or they are hiding something.
19. History/ Logs – Check on his computer (or phone) internet history and see for yourself if he is stalking someone. Visited web pages may also tell you about his plans for the weekend with his friends and his mistress.
20. Secrets – Check his drawers for another bunch of secrets. You might uncover a pack of condoms, petals of flowers, new phone, hotel brochures, two tickets for a show and a lot more.
21. Apps installed in his phone – In the mobile world, it is safe to say that you are what you use (in terms of apps). There are apps that you should not see in a committed man’s phone like Tinder, SMS Cleaner Free, Grindr, Superstud Blackbook, Google Voice and a lot more.
22. Sleeping with a cellphone- Does he sleep now with his phone? Maybe he is used to putting his phone anywhere in the house but now, it is always close to him.
23. Late night work – Is he the workaholic one? If yes, he can’t be too busy forever. We did mention that you check his car mileage. It must coincide with his claims that he stayed in the office until the wee hours of the morning.
24. Frequent hang out – A married or committed person should not always hang out with his friends anytime he wants because he has a lot of responsibilities. A change of lifestyle from the always present husband or wife to a party goer may raise suspicions.
25. Phone bills – Is there an elevated increase in your telephone bills? Or are there new numbers he frequently calls that you know too well do not belong to a company he used to correspond with? You can also trace the numbers if they belong to a corporation or are just merely private numbers.
26. Bank account – Couples tend to have conjugal accounts and properties. If anyone of you spends a sum of money, it is expected that you consult one another. What if he is looting your hard earned cash to finance his womanizing schemes? You better find out now before all that you have worked hard for goes to the pockets of a gold digging paramour.
27. Check the trash – Funny how scavenging for the truth will lead you to rummaging a trash bin, right? People like to believe that when you throw something, it will be gone forever. You might find something like checkout bills on their date, receipts from a nearby flower shop, love letter drafts, lipstick-stained tissue and things like that.
28. Behavioral changes – Suddenly he forgets his duties and obligations as a partner or as a father, insists that you go out of town with the kids, forgets family affairs or abstain from attending and give excuses or suggest plans that will keep him away from you. Has he turned cold and stopped being sweet or making love to you? Something smells fishy.
29. Keep a journal – Keep track of all the signs of his infidelities and try to put the pieces together by jotting them down on a journal.
30. Set him up – You now have an idea about the details of their next date based on the fruits of your spying labor. It is about time that you catch him in blazing offense or in the actual act. Whatever happens, do not blow your composure and just show him that you have uncovered his dirty little secrets.
It is a sad fact that all men are prone to cheating. We know how painful things could go so plan your moves well and proceed with loads of caution in order to substantiate all your claims. You deserve to know the truth but spend a couple of days pondering on what to do if all of your suspicions are confirmed. Think about the consequences of ending a relationship and all the things that you will leave behind. Still we tell you that even though your relationship is on the rocks, there might be some things worth saving.
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