Marriages and relationships get torn apart because of infidelities. If you are already dubious of your boyfriend, girlfriend, wife or husband’s loyalty and faithfulness but cannot find a proof to substantiate your claims that your lover is doing blazing offenses with coworker either at work or through cellphone calls, this blog will light your way.
While the classic top ten list of red flags are very common, we took extra initiative in making an expanded list because we want you to be close to 100% certain before you make any accusations.
Perhaps, your lover has already gone beyond repair that hiring a private detective or spending a penny is no longer practical. His cellphone and behavior might harbor information on whatever he is up to so you better check them first for some warnings.
You can solve the puzzle all by yourself. To cut the chase short, here are the classic red flags you should look for in attempting to deliberate if your lover is cheating with a coworker.
1. Lack of intimacy and affection- Your mate shift from the sweet one to a cold and lifeless lover. He also keeps on missing little things he does to you like a little peck on the cheeks or an intimate touch before he bid you farewell. Things get more alarming when he no longer looks in your eye when you make love.
2. Sudden increase in self-obsession – Notice if he suddenly becomes too busy making himself beautiful. For instance, he is shaving too often, spraying too much perfume or buffing his body more than he ever did in the past.
3. Engrossment in his cellphone – Does it appear that something is too amusing with his cellphone that he does not want to be parted from it? He talks to someone quite often and he puts his phone under the pillow when he sleeps. Worst, he changed his password and you can no longer access his phone.
4. Existence of a favorite contact/s – One to three names appears too many times in his call and web histories like he is keeping track or stalking someone.
5. Signs of deleted messages – It is quite impossible that he does not store or receive any message in a day at all. It could be he is burying tracks immediately.
6. Living a bachelor life – Posing as unmarried or single may be a manifestation that he is trying to bait some fishes in the sea.
7. Dual email and social media accounts – Not only does he pose as a single person; he also wants to keep his door open. Everything becomes more alarming if he is harboring more than one profile with different names.
8. Wardrobe change – From the classic polo and jeans, your guy shifted to a ragged one with a band shirt and tattered jeans. Men dress well to serve two purposes – look good and impress a woman.
9. Regular ‘me’ time – What used to be ‘us’ is now turning to me and you. If someone is really committed in a relationship, he would not really bother thinking about being alone.
10. Distant, aloof and forgetful – He may be physically present but his mind is someplace. There are also cases wherein you have to remind him of your forthcoming dinner date, family affair and scheduled payment of bills.
11. Straight to the shower – After coming home from work, he just say “Hi”, walk past you and head straight to the shower to wash away traces of his romantic escapade.
12. Bad cellphone habits – Not only that he is too engrossed in his phone, he also moves away from you when someone texts or calls him. The most puzzling thing is that he keeps his voice real low.
13. Frequent changing of passwords – As long as you cannot access his social media accounts and gadgets, his thinks his tracks are covered.
14. Purchase of new phone or sim without telling you – So one day you found him owning an extra phone or additional sim card he only told you about when he got caught.
15. Change in sexual appetite – Evaluate your companion if he no longer finds you sexy or if he suddenly introduces new moves in the bed; either he learned it from a magazine or from a ‘teacher’.
16. He feels suffocated – He does not want to be alone with you anymore. He feels awkward when you two are together and it seems like he is preventing something from being brought up in your conversations.
17. Evasion of glances – Inability of one person to keep an eye contact may suggest dishonesty and shamefulness.
18. No more gentle caress – Couples do little touches to one another as a sign of affection. These contacts are quick displays of love and affection. If he already stopped, his mind might be drifting off somewhere to someone.
19. Frequent overtime – Since his workplace may not be accessible to you, he can use it as a leverage to do extramarital stuff.
20. Deviations in his toll pass history – Going the other way when he claims to go to a certain place with his colleagues does not speak well of him.
21. Unusual visits to unusual places – Check his car navigation system and look for places where you can raise a red flag such as inns and motels.
22. Constant busy schedule- He passes on dates and other family affairs and insists that he is buried in a shitload of work. Being away from you can be his escape to see his mistress.
23. Always working at home – If someone gets the job done and performs well at the workplace, then there is no need to bring home the tasks.
24. Frequent social gatherings – Cheaters usually pass guys’ night out, team buildings and business parties as excuse.
25. Short to long trip – His usual 30 minute jog at the park extends to an hour or so.
26. Unexplained decrease in savings – Where do all your mate’s savings go? Brewing romances need a lot of time together and this means spending a lot of money on secret places and a rain of gifts to affect.
27. Items on the receipt do not appear – Check the trash bin and his pockets. This sounds ridiculous but people like to believe that anything they throw will be gone forever. Recover some evidence this time.
28. No more secrets – You were his soulmate and primary confidant on every matter he considers vital to him, his performance and your relationship but his lips are unusually sealed now.
29. Same old routines – Surprises and explorations only come once in a blue moon if not never.
30. Lack of enthusiasm – It feels like his life force was drained out of him and nothing seems to interest him anymore even your stories.
31. Pointing fingers – Patience is no longer a virtue and he gets angry and blames you even for the smallest of mistakes.
32. Splurges of gifts – To cover the guilt, they may also try to woo you by showering you with sweetness and false affection. In doing this, he can mislead you into believing that you are the only one.
33. Alone with someone – Notice if he likes to stick with one particular person in the office.
34. Argue then leave – Sometimes, you engage in conflict that ends up with him leaving the house. Your quarrels may be his decoy to escape your watch.
35. Apple of the eye – Is there a person that he commends and mentions a lot when you engage in small talks then suddenly he stopped telling stories about that special person? You get the drift.
36. No more invites – Long ago, you were his trophy. He likes to bring you to parties with his teammates but now you are just a decoration at home.
37. Emotional outbursts – Volatility and mood swings may be his means of pushing you away or turning the guilt outward to you.
38. Things have changed – Cheaters always insist that you are no longer what you used to be when the only thing that has changed is his heart.
39. No more hearts and flowers – He stopped buying flowers and showing you off to his friends.
40. Lone traveler – He likes to travel but you are left behind. Sometimes, he will make you believe that he will go on alone but in reality, his mistress will fulfill his romantic escapade.
41. Refusal to go to certain areas for no reason – Was he the adventurous type who loves to try out new places? If he changed to someone who hangs out with you at same spots, he might be avoiding something.
42. A stash of condoms in his wallet or car – Stocking up contraceptives on easy access suggests that he is always on the go.
43. Hair and lipstick at wrong places – Lipstick stains and long strands of hair in his clothing are indeed red flags. Need I say more?
44. New scent on his shirt – Your olfactory senses pick up a different smell from his clothes. Other person’s perfumes can only adhere to his shirt if they are too physically close with each other or unless his tastes have changed and he now has a penchant for female spray. The odor can also resemble that of massage oils or the scent of sex.
45. Someone in his circle does not visit him – Get to know his circle and look for someone who does not have the nerve to visit him at home.
46. Somebody’s savior – Being particularly helpful to one person makes him or her feel special. Although there is not an affair yet, in time, some feelings may develop.
47. Guards are always up – Suddenly, he became so defensive about nothing and everything. It feels as though he is always prepared or anticipating a clash.
48. Not so friendly relatives and friends – He might be telling his secrets and his issues about an impending separation to his family and friends. They do not want to betray him but they feel guilty and sorry for you that is why they resorted to avoidance.
49. Sudden interest in new music genre, art and poetry – Perhaps, he wanted to blend in with the culture and lifestyle of his new babe.
50. Missing jewelry – Your spouse stopped wearing your wedding ring or any ornament you have given him and gives faulty reasons as to why.
51. Pulling earlobes and touching the nose – These are non-verbal clues you should look for when you confront him because these are signs of lying.
52. Good storytelling – If you ask him questions, his answers are well structured, polished and complex as though he had rehearsed his alibi too well.
53. Stammering, um’s and ah’s, hesitation – His speech may be a sign that he is adulterous. He might be using these to delay the conversation as to ‘think’ what he will say next.
54. Leaning too close – This is his last shot to make you feel assured that you are the only one. He will physically get too close to you to solicit or regain your trust.
55. Viagra usage – If he is on Viagra and other male enhancers but you do not make love too often, then he might be serving two masters or more.
Beware that things may get a ugly as days go on. Brace yourself to deal with the fallout in case your spouse/ boyfriend/ girlfriend caught you meddling with his affairs or if you realized that most of these are happening to your relationship right now.
Do not let your partner’s infidelity with a coworker consume you. Man up, get a hold of yourself and remember that life must go on. Share this post and help spread truth.
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